greasy spooners

Mario's

2010-11-11T10:23:00.000-08:00

Back in the early 90s I would eat at Mario's at least once every couple of months with my sister. Don't know why we always went there, it was just something we did. It was always packed. The place was made up of several small rooms, which added to the coziness of the place. The meatball grinders were made with lovely Italian bread. Hard and flakey on the outside, mooshy on the inside, full on gooey cheese and homemade meatballs. So when I heard that Mario's was still there with a much reduced restaurant and menu size, I thought I'd try it out.
My ride was late, and I was anxious about having to wait in line. Turns out I shouldn't have been. The place was empty and remained so for much of the lunch. They have a walk up on the street and maybe I didn't see the people going to that.
The place had lost some of it's coziness. It was bare and smaller. The nice lady in the hole in the wall took our order. Had to get the grinder and pasta salad. (I forgot to order the pasta but a fellow Spooner was kind enough to share).
The bread was the same. The cheese was it's gooey self, but the meatballs were few and tasted store bought. The pasta salad was "ehh?". I realize the owners probably reduced the size of the place and menu to cut costs, but it lost a lot of charm in the process. Can't say I disliked the new Mario's, but I'm rnot unning out try it again. If you're in the neighborhood give it a try. Looks like me and Sis need a new place.

Food: 3- just OK.
Price: 3- again, not bad/not great. You'll get more meatball ratio for the money at Subway
Kitch: 0- miss the old brick walls and Italian stuff
Bonus: Good company/conversation kept my depression for the place away

Wood Yard BBQ

2010-09-24T11:48:00.000-07:00

This was another one of the out-of-the-way places now made famous by spikey-haired Food Network types. So, excuse me if I was skeptical.
We smelled the place half way down the street and salivary glands kicked into overdrive. Then, you pull into a working wood yard, selling specialty wood for BBQ-ers. A nearby train was blaring its horn, some old country was playing on the speakers, and I knew I already liked it better than half the BBQ joints in KC, and I hadn't eaten anything yet.
There was line out the door. This doesn't always mean its good. I've stood in too many lines for crap BBQ. But, I watched orders going out the door to the lovely little brick patio out front and everything looked good. I ordered the burnt-end chili on the suggestion of a trusted friend and some cheesey corn, as I am a Jackstack BBQ cheesey corn fanatic.
The chili itself (and I was a National Chili Cook-off judge for years, thank you very much) was fantastic on its own. It was three bean variety, not too sweet, not too spicy. But, throw on the burnt ends, and holy shit!
Wow, that was some good chili. The cheesy-corn was forgettable, but I dumped it into the remnants of chili and kicked it up a notch.
The other Spooners gave the burnt end sandwich a thumbs up, and that's good enough for me, sir.
I will definitely returning to try some of their other treats.

Service: 4 Spoons Long-ish wait, but once the order was in, we got it quick from a nice old lady who called me "hun".

Food: 4 Spoons What I had, I'll stack up against any BBQ place around. Congrats Food Network, you got it right for once.

Kitch: 4 Old, rundown houses for a restaurants always work for me.

Bonus: Booze, and you get to watch the pitmaster work right out there on the patio.

Square PIzza

2010-09-10T12:39:00.000-07:00

...where, wait for it....the pizza is square! Located on the Historic Independence Square. Sensing a trend? But goofy play on words aside, this is a good pizza joint. In a world of Dominoes, Pizza Butt and Papa Johns, it's good to know there still some solid pizza makers out there.
Square Pizza has the usual kinds of pizzas, Meat Lovers, Triple Cheese, but some different ones like the Monterey Chicken (ranch, chicken, tomatoes, bacon, red onions, mozzarella and monterey jack cheese). Prices aren't what you're going to pay for some delivery place, but this isn't delivery pizza, dummy. They do a lunch special, $6.99 for a large slice, salad and drink, and yes they do deliver.
They gots booze, too.
Price: 3 spoons, good food for a good price
Service: 4 spoons, walk up and order
Kitch: 3, full of Indy goodness
Bonus: You can watch the drunks stumble out of Big John's on the Corner, one of best, divey-est dive bars you'll ever find. And right next to Dave's Bakery, for your after pizza dessert.

photo used w/o any sort of permission.

Clem's Drive-In

2010-08-24T08:01:00.000-07:00

Oh, Clem's. What fond memories I have of you. My Dad, crumbly burgers falling out the bottom of my bun, and having to eat it with a plastic spoon. Great curly fries, super shakes, and the occasional brain sandwich my Old Man snuck in as a gag and watched me make a face when I figured out it wasn't a tenderloin. And the tenderloins. Some say the best in town. That was true.
Clem's withered and died a coupla of years back. New owners with new, clean grease pits took over and it's not the same.
When I saw the new sign and new coat of paint, I just had to try. I scouted ahead before I took Dad, just to make sure it was good. Glad I did. Service was awful. How long does it take to scoop out a crumbly burger? I like my fries crispy, not burnt, thank-you-very-much.
The shake was soupy and tasted weird. The tenderloin, oh the tenderloin. Just okay. 30 years of the same grease sure makes a place taste different.
I'm going to go take a nap now, and dream of Mugs Up.

Max's Auto Diner

2010-08-17T11:05:00.000-07:00

Ok, I was watching that local restaurant PBS show and these 3 douches went on and on about how great this place in Waldo was. Again, I heard the famous line "it's the best hamburgers in the city" - Ring...Ring.. "Hello PBS. I would like to pledge a whole sum of 'shut the hell up' please. Do I get a tote bag for that?" Let me make this quick. The burgers taste like burger king , the curly fries are from Arby's and the milkshakes are from a dark awful place. The onion rings made me burp all day long, but were good. But the tots, I have to say, were pretty great as was the warm baklava. Kitch was fine classic little place and the service was pretty grumpy. So, if you need a burger, go around the corner to the old Dairy Queen (I know, I know, it's a chain- but it's a time warp). They have a Dig-Dug machine, and the old yellow bench tables. And when they cook the burgers the whole inside fills up with smoke. It brought me back to 1985- hasn't changed a bit. So 2 spoons for Max's and 3 spoons for the DQ just for the memories.

RJ's Bob-Be-Que Shack

2010-07-30T08:19:00.000-07:00

When I saw that weirdo from the Food Network, the one with the white, spikey hair, was doing a KC BBQ special show, I had to watch, even though I don't normally catch "Diners, Dives and whatever". I was glad he chose off the grid places instead of the usual Oklahoma Joe's, Gates, Arthur Bryants triumvirate. One of said places he visited was RJ's Bob-Be-Que shack. I was intrigued by the menu that had things like smoke sausage in corn husks, and lamb ribs. And that the pit master was a classically trained chef.
So we went last week. You can tell the show had helped business. It was packed, and I heard several people talking about the show, "I never knew this place existed", or "I never heard of them til now"etc.
My fellow spooners had the ribs, while I ordered the rib meat sandwich and those aforementioned sausages.
The sandwich was like eating meat flavored hay. Dry, dry, dry. The sauce was ketchup mixed with honey. I think I remember the chef making the sauce on the show making the sauce using honey, and it tasted like it for sure. Oh, how I hates sweet sauce. The fries were good, but tasted like Red Robin fries. The slaw I could have got at Price Chopper.
For as long as I waited for the sausages, it wasn't worth it. You'd think something with jalapenos would have some flavor.
When I asked about the ribs, I got a "Meh?" and a shoulder shrug from my fellow Spooners.
Maybe there's a reason nobody's heard of 'em.

Price: 4 spoons
Service: 2 spoons, mostly because I got to hear way too much about our server's social life.
Kitch: 3 spoons. It's a BBQ place.
On a side note, DD&D is doing a show on Swagger, a place readers know I love. He (spikey) better not do something to screw that up.

Shorty Smalls: Greasy Spooning on the road again

2010-07-21T09:59:00.000-07:00

Was in Branson, MO this weekend. What's it with me and the hillbilly locales? Anyway, stopped in at favorite place we've been to before: Shorty Smalls. Shorty's is a local chain down there. I know, GS don't do chains, but this is small enough to fit in, and I had to tell everyone about something (see why later).
First, all the booths are named for a Branson entertainer. We got the honor of sitting in the Jim Stafford booth. This guy's a millionaire because of that dumb-ass "I Don't Like Spiders and Snakes" song. The booth is surrounded by his memorabilia.
I ordered the Shorty Special: ribs, chicken fired steak, beans, coleslaw and a cheesey biscuit ala Red Lobster. Beans: so-so. Coleslaw: pretty good. Ribs were cooked nice but the sauce was too sweet for me. When I saw how thin the chicken fired steak was, I was worried, but it turned out to be fork-cutting tender and tasted great. Over-all, not a bad meal. Now, for the good part.
We've had the blackberry cobbler before, which is, in a word, fantastic. But, we decided to get another dessert too, this time. What we got was very possibly the best apple pie I've had in my life. Sorry grandma, who slaved all day peeling apples by hand from her tree in the back yard. Sorry, beautiful daughter who makes all her pies for me with love.
The Shorty Smalls apple pie came out in a hot cast iron skillet filled with still bubbling butter. The pie itself was plopped down in the middle of all that dairy with ice cream on top. The ice cream melted into the butter. The butter melted into the pie. Ohmygodohmygodohmygod....... I'm still thinking about right now.
The server tried to take the plate away and almost got a fork in the back of his hand. We were taking the blackberry cobbler and running it through the leavings from the cream/butter.
Fat? Check.
Happy? Check.

Food: 4 spoons
Price: 4 without booze, but because of all the bible belt liquor taxes end s up a 2. Dropped way too much $.
Kitch: 4 Three words: Tony Orlando Booth
Bonus: Did I mention the pie?

Hayes Hamburgers

2010-06-29T14:53:00.000-07:00

We ventured out to Vivon Road to eat at Hayes. They are known for their 24 hr greasy breakfasts but we went for the burgers instead. I was told they cook their burgers the way White Castle used to make them. So I said " what could go wrong there!?" Hayes' website states " You can smell the onions from a mile away" ...Uh oh....
It's a classic quaint place with chrome stools, sweaty fry cook and classic grumpy old lady waitress that's been here since the invention of ketchup. We sat at the back corner table smiling and enjoying the kitsch when I noticed we were all crying. A very Twilight Zone moment. Looking around the diner I noticed no one else had any of our symptoms. They could have cared less. They must have gotten the onion vaccine in 50's that was mandatory by all high schools. Anyways, while trying to finish our meal through our tears, we decided the burgers were only average. Plus, sad to say, the shake machine was broke. So, no malt for me. The pie was good, nothing great. So I give respect to keeping it real , but if you have to wear an astronaut suit to eat there, I say "Houston we have a problem."

In a Tub

2010-06-18T10:30:00.000-07:00

Today, we visited that Northland tradition, In a Tub. A magical place where everything is fried, and comes, not surprisingly, in a tub. They are famous (some say infamous) for their deep fried tacos. I ordered 2 of the beef, bean and cheese. Now, when I say cheese, I don't mean anything that probably came out of cow, or is the color of anything found in nature. This is the same stuff you shake out on popcorn, or comes with your cheapo Kraft mac and cheese.

I also got the cheese burrito. They must get their frozen burritos from the same place the Independence School District does, because they were exactly like the ones my high school served. That's not necessarily a bad thing. Both tacos and burritos tasted exactly like I knew they would. Deep fried goodness. There are some haters out there (usually poor outsiders drug up there by some Northlander), who have left less than favorable reviews about In a Tub. (Insert nasally voice) "Ohhh, they're so greasy. Ewww my tummy hurt after eating there." No. Really? A place that deep fries everything made you feel yucky and tired. I'm making a sad unhappy face for you right now.

On the way out I noticed they had a sign that said "Ice Cream is Back!". Well, you know that means I had to get a shake. Oh, and some chili pie to wash it down. The shake was OK. Nothing to make a big proclamation about. The chili pie could have been great if the Fritos weren't stale. Sonic still wins out there.
"So, take off to the great, white north, it's a beauty way to go."

Food: 3. 5 spoons. I see this place as a great hangover cure.
Price: 4 spoons. $6.50 for 2 tacos, a burrito, and a meduim drink. You won't get that at Taco Bell
Kitch: 1. No decor. I mean none.

Greasy Spooners Odyssey: Chattanooga, TN and Dalton GA

2010-06-08T13:18:00.000-07:00

How, you ask, did I end up in Dalton, GA, the carpet capital of US? Well, my wife had training for a new job this week in lovely Dalton and I got dragged along. The owners of her company are good ol' Southerners and they like to meet the families of all their new hires. They paid for everything, and when I met them they turned out to be some the coolest people I know. The only downside was I had to try to find something to do for 4 days. The Greasy Spooner in me accepted the challenge.
Dalton is only 20 minutes south of Chattanooga, TN, so I decided I needed some Memphis style BBQ. Readers of this blog, will know I'm a BBQ snob. I know Memphis style is different from KC's, but good meat is good meat, right? I did my research on Chattanooga, and "Sticky Fingers" seemed to be the accepted winner by the locals for ribs, despite the fact it's a chain. I was surprised that I had to explain the different BBQ disciplines to the waitress who was from Texas, for Chrissakes! I ordered the dry rub, as the any other seemed too much like something I would get from KC.
Ugh! First, the ribs were "fall off the bone". Now, that may sound great to the uninformed, but any true BBQ snob will tell you ribs should tear off the bone (he says in a snooty English accent while sipping a martini). Fall of the bone means they've been boiled ahead of time which is heresy, and the place should be burned down just for that. The ribs themselves were dry and bland even though they were covered in what I would describe as the same stuff Red Robin puts on their fries. The sides sucked, too. The bright side, really great cornbread. They were more like cupcake texture than what I'm used too.
Sticky Fingers, Chattanooga, TN: 1 spoon ( you got that for the cornbread and halfway decent service).

Besides being a conniseur of all things greasy, I'm also a Civil War buff, so before the trip to Chickamauga battlefield, I stopped in at what was billed by reviews as the best Biscuits and Gravy in Chattanooga, the New York Diner. Really, your gonna name your place the the New York Diner in the deep South. Have you seen that El Paso salsa commercial about "gettin' rope"?

I ordered 2 eggs, bacon, and a full order of B&G. Gotta say, not bad. But not as good as I would expect for Tennesee. The home fires, however, were probably the best I've had, period.

New York Diner, Chattanooga, TN: 3.5 spoons.

Also in Chattanooga is a little dive bar called "the Pickle Barrel. This was my kinda place. Looked like Fred Sanford and some place from Harry Potter had a baby. I don't think a single stool matched, and I'm pretty sure most were dated about Civil War era. There's a ricketty spiral staircase (that I can't imagine navigating drunk) that goes up to a tree lined deck. The railing looked completely unstable and the flooring crooked. I'm in love. On the menu was the usual fair, including fried pickles. I ordered a Yeungling beer, cause you can't get 'em west of the Mississippi.

Pickle Barrel, Chattanooga, TN: 5 spoons (kitch off the scale)

Now, actually in Dalton, GA we ate at a fantastic Mexican Place (not Tex-Mex, Mexican), called Los Reyes. The place looked like an old hacienda, and the food was off the el chickety chain. I had a burrito and chile relino platter, piping hot (both temperature and spice) with beans and rice. Worth the stop if visitng or passing through.

Los Reyes, Dalton, GA: 4.5 spoons

One other place worth mentioning in Dalton is the Filling Station in their historic downtown. Now, when you drive up, you notice a lot of old people. This, fellow Spooners, is blessing and a curse. Old people means cheap prices, but it also means bland food. You put a $10 bill in the pickle jar and get all-you-can-eat Southern food. Mashed potatoes, fried okra, fried chicken, collard greens, etc. As suspected, all surprisingly bland. And no gravy for the taters? What planet are you from?

But the pies, oh the pies, they made up for everything. Best peacn pie "I ever et, y'all".

Was it great? No. Did I eat till I was physically ill? Yes

The Filling Station, Dalton, GA: 4 spoons (the pies saved you)

Cree-Mee, Gravois Mills, MO

2010-06-01T06:18:00.000-07:00

Did some travellin' this weekend down to the Lake of the Ozarks for my wife's 25 year HS reunion (insert hillybilly jokes, here). Outside our lovely motel stood the Cree-Mee. I had to eat there just for the name. They boasted "the best tenderloins in town", not hard for a town of 209.
First, although they have a walk up window, you have to go inside. It looks like my kids built it. Somebody actually built this place, stood back and said, "yeah, this looks great".
Anyway, the tenderloin was good, hand battered, and probably the best in town. The fries were crunchy and chili fries even better. The burger was a nice, non fast food chain burger. Shakes top-notch. Will definitely stop by next time we're passing thru. If for no other reason, to make me feel better about mmy own home improvement abilities.

this last one is just for ambiance. Yes, that sign really says "jacuzzi"

Thirsty's Cantina

2010-05-04T17:17:00.000-07:00

Oh Thirsty's, how I missed you. As a follow up to Saturday's review, I had to go back and try an old favorite. There was much anticipation in the household for taco Tuesday at Thirsty's. Would it be the same? Of course not, I had kids with me. We arrived at their corner location and parked in front of Planters. There was 70s rock blasting from the speakers outside. Good sign. I digest better to Steve Miller Band.
We were greeted by the GM, who informed my kids it was "Kids Pay for Parents" night. The place of course had none of the old divey Westport locale, but it was bright and friendly. Our waitress quickly had our drinks and orders and brought us some salsa. Hot salsa. For once, salsa that is hot. Not say its hot and its not. Hot.
Our "all you can eat" tacos actually came with beans and rice. I find this usual and smart. Unusual because I don't see it alot. Smart because beans and rice are cheap, You load up on those, you don't have to make so many tacos. And the refried beans were good. Like, really good. Not the tasteless crap you get most places. Rice was good too. The GM informed me they have changed the rice recipe 10 times over the years and you only get about 30% of the people that like them, no matter the recipe. Oh, well.
Oh, and let me say their not just a Mexican place. Their motto is "I'd rather eat food in a bar, than drink in a restaurant". I agree.
So on to the tacos. They were good. Not "oh, my God"fantastic. But good. The kind with the deep fried shell, not out of box kind. Most places you get meat, cheese and lettuce. Thirsty's kicks it up a notch with adding tomatoes, green onions and parmesan sprinkled on top the shredded cheese.
Add in a Tecate, and you have a recipe for heaven.
Food: 4.5 spoons
Price: 3 spoons
Kitch: 1 spoons. But it didn't need it. Nice clean bar and happy customers.
Bonus: My daughter's new favorite place. I'll make the drive from Indy any Tuesday.

Eat your way around the world, or at least the City Market

2010-05-01T11:02:00.000-07:00

When I met my wife 17 years ago, she was Market Master of the historic City Market. Many credit her for turning it from a flea market to the first class farmer's market it is today. She hasn't worked there for many years, but most of the farmers and shop owners from those days still give her a big hug when we come around. But this blog is about food.
The City Market is not only a great place for fresh, locally grown produce and products, but also a great place to spend the morning grazing.
In addition to just wandering the islands and stalls for free samples, I usually grab a coffee and a fluffy scone at the City Market Coffee Company. The place gets packed early, but here's a secret. Right up front there's a place to drop a $1 and just pick up an 8oz. cup o' Joe and avoid the line. But, if you want one of those scones I talked about, you'll have to get in line.

Now I need some protein. Carolla's Italian Market grills their own sausages and burgers right there. Or there's other vendors scattered around grilling sausages and dogs with plenty of grilled fresh peppers and onions. There's even a little breakfast cart selling biscuits and gravy.
I discovered the beef pies at Tikka house this morning. My fingers still smell like the yummy beef, onions and spices packed inside this crusty little piece of heaven. They've got feta filled and gyro pies, too.

Also new is Bloom bakery. You can watch them making bread from the big window outside. They have, in additional to their fresh baked breads, wonderful little cupcakes called buds. They bake them in those little cups the dentist gives you your mouthwash in at teeth cleaning time. My daughter and I split a Vanilla Bean and a Hummingbird (orange zest with coconut butter cream icing). Yes, it was as good as it sounds.
Then we all split a ham and cheese with jalapeno stuffed croissant. Nummy.....
On the way out, after snagging some Morrel mushrooms, we found a lady making Shroopwaffels (sp?) outside the Dutch Flower place. These were little waffleconey material with cinnamon maple syrup between. My daughter wanted to go back for more.
There's more. Way more. Salsa and dips and cheeses and jellies....
A stop at Alhabasshi's Mediterranean Market is worth it. Sample all the great nuts and dried fruits. Outside he sells spices out of the bag for a dollar a scoop. Kids will walk away with a cinnamon stick for free.

Just north of the Market is a large Asian Market. If you can put on your big-boy pants and breath through your mouth, you can get cheap, authentic noodles, spices and dumplings straight from Asia. I always see people bringing in coolers and buying massive amounts of seafood, despite the fishy smell. And don't forget about the restaurants scattered around the perimeter of the Market. Winslow's has solid BBQ and great place to hang out on summer nights. I miss the Delaware Cafe, but I hear the the Farmhouse that replaced it is good. Don't waste your time waiting for breakfast at Cascone's. I never have understood the appeal. Ketchupy Italian sauce and expensive prices are what await you after waiting an hour in line.
I discovered a couple of places from my past right next the Planters (a KC institution in itself). While living in my crappy little studio apartment off the Plaza I used to order Antonio's Pizza. For a time, Antonio's and Torre's battled for pizza supremacy in Westport. Torre's is still there, so that tells you who won. So I was surprised and happy to see Antonio's is back, down by the market. New Greasy Spooners adventure!
Right on the corner next door, is Thirsty's. This is another Westport veteran that moved down to the Market. I can't tell you how many Sundays I spent at Thirsty's having all-you-can-eat tacos and watching the Chiefs lose. So glad they're back. My wife almost cried when she saw the sign.

Stroud's

2010-04-30T14:23:00.000-07:00

I have to start out by saying I miss the old location at 85th and Troost. Yes, it's been gone for awhile, but the hurt is still fresh. Come on, a creaky, uneven floor, and an old guy playing at the piano? It doesn't get any better than that. The one up north is still cool, but the new location in Fairway has no style.
I ask every person new to KC the same question, "have you been to Stroud's?". I always get the same answer. "Yes, but the chicken wasn't that good."
I'm going to let you in on a secret the moron who sent you there forgot to tell you. Come closer. Lean in...
The chicken's not that great. Never has been. Now, the chicken fried steak, the pork chops (which you can get grilled or fried, or both on the same plate), the mashed potatoes, oh God the mashed potatoes, and pretty much everything else is sweet, delicious mana from heaven.
My wife and I have been trying to copy the green beans for years, but still haven't got it right. And my sister and I could finish off a platter of gizzards and livers before you could say "Gross! Gizzards and livers?"
Next secret. Have everybody order a different side, that way you can have them all.
So the next time your aunt Matilda comes in from Cleveland, and you want to take her to Stroud's, repeat after me, "don't get the chicken."

Food: 5 spoons
Service: 4 spoons, you have to wait, but it's worth it. I think they've had the same waitresses forever.
Kitch: 2 (I averaged the 2 locations)
Bonus: The cinnamon rolls!

Classy Burger-geddon

2010-04-26T09:07:00.000-07:00

-To start off, I’m not a big fan of Gourmet hamburgers. A good burger is a good burger, but for the sake of argument we go head to head with Kansas City's top foo-foo burger joints. Also, I'd like to add I prefer my burgers a little thinner so Hi-Boy is still the real winner here. But BRGR puts up a good fight; great for kids, dates or out of towners. They try to keep it real, with burgers everyone will enjoy, unlike Blanc. The BRGR Mac and Cheese debate is still going on here at GS. It's tasty, but I dont think it is right for kids - tastes like wine is in i,t or some funky cheese yo mama might like. Oh, and I think both places have soupy ketchup.

Burger-geddon

2010-04-23T11:56:00.000-07:00

It's on. It's more than stripy pants versus checker pants. As any reader of this blog knows, I am a dyed-in-the-wool Hi-Boy lover. But its time to give Big-Boy it's due. The Spooners headed to the one on 40-Hiway in sweet-sweet Indy, home to so many delicious dives.
The place itself froze in time mid 80s. That always a good thing.
We ordered a variety: burgers, tenderloin, fries, onion rings, tots, shakes and something wonderful sounding. A bacon-dog.
They should have called my burger the lettuce burger instead of the Big Boy. Bland. Tasteless, except for the lettuce. The tots were fine, and the shake okay. The onion rings could have been a little crisper, and the tenderloin was just sad.
The bacon-dog was the best thing, which isn't saying much because it wasn't that good. C'mon Big Boy, I wanted you to put up more of a fight. You got this rep to live up to. A history.
Victory to Hi-Boy.

Bonus: To top off this sad little adventure we went to Flea Mart down 40 a ways. Always on the look out for something kitchy, I was excited. It just got worse. They say the gates of Hell are disguised as places of misery, like the DMV and clown colleges. We found another. It was like a really expensive Salvation Army store. Expired meds and Conway Twitty albums anyone? How 'bout a Klingon knife?

Food: 2 Spoons, right out of the freezer to the fryer
Kitch: 4, I love the 80s
Price: 3, not too bad
Bonus: Bacon on a hot dog.

LOBITO'S Steak Burger?

2010-03-31T08:54:00.000-07:00

I'm sad. So sad. I wanted to like this place. It would make 40 HiWay and Blue Ridge Cutoff the Golden Triangle of fabulous fast food, Hi-Boy, Dickson' Chili and Lobitos. Alas, it was not be. It was like Christmas day, where you're expecting a Red Rider BB gun and getting a sweater, instead.

Service, kitch factor (see photos) were 5 spoons easy. They had all the cheesy Mexican decor and creepy Easter bunnies. The lady that served us was super nice. I could see it broke Jacques's heart to tell her "No, I don't want the rest of my fish taco".

I ordered the Carne Asada. My steak was bland and tough. My beans bland and soupy. My rice was, ...well you get the picture. The steak burger was even so-so. Plenty of grub, but if I wanted tons of bland Tex-Mex I'd go to Ponac's (oh, snap!)

I'm sorry. I'm going to go lay down now.

Goooood...Good For You.

2010-03-22T13:49:00.000-07:00

Hooooray We Made it into the Top 10 !

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Swensons- Akron Ohio

2010-03-19T11:32:00.000-07:00

This aint no crappy Sonic. I married an Akron girl and she introduced me to Swenson's. An old time burger drive-in with car hops. The Galley Boy is the signature hamburger which was tasty with a hint of bbq sauce (a little too sweet). The menu is very extensive, sloppy joes ,pork tenderloins,fried chicken, deep-fried cheesecake. The rings were very good and I got an inside tip you can order the rings "chopped." They chop up the onions then dip'em for a fried treat easy to eat. A great selection of drinks the Whip is their signature beverage a minty light whippy shake. I think Akronites love it more for the memories than I do for the taste but I do admit its pretty damn good. I think the smell of the onions on my cheeseburger overwhelmed me and distracted me from enjoying it as much as I should have. Now the next time I go back to Akron I have to try Sky-way their local rival. All in all I give it 4 spoons

The Gaf

2010-03-19T08:54:00.000-07:00

A quaint Irish pub.You know the type someone named Shamus boiling pork in the back . But what makes them special was the Curry Fries. No that's not my bad Chinese accent ordering at Arby's. I said Curry Fries - now listen up Voltron, they take delicious lightly salted fresh cut fries and add a bowl of curry sauce for dipping. Sweet with a little zing. As Connie Chung once said "Maury these fries are making me moist." We also tried the loaded fries but they ruined the fries by adding too much gloop on them. Thats right I said gloop- Cheese,bacon,sour cream, one of shamus' fingers. So stick to the curry fries and have a pint on me.
3 spoons.

Gates BBQ

2010-03-18T06:12:00.000-07:00

Yes, I know, its a Kansas City institution. That doesn't make it good.
I haven't been to Gates in years, and when a buddy wanted to go there for lunch, I gave an inner groan. Don't get me wrong, I always used Gates as a control if you will, when it comes to KC BBQ. Somewhere in the middle. The meat's okay, the sauce is so-so. Everybody else is either better or worse.
We went to the "original" location at 1325 East Emanuel Cleaver Blvd. It was clean and I didn't get yelled out immediately when I came in. Good start. The menu's a bit confusing for the uninitiated, and Gates has a long tradition of the ladies behind the counter screaming "MAY I HELP YOU?!!!!"
I ordered a beef sandwich, BECAUSE THERE WERE NO BURNT ENDS. No burnt ends at a BBQ place. Yes, they have them at other locations, but really?
$11. That's what I paid for a sandwich and a drink. No sides. $11.
My friends that ordered sides walked out paying almost $20. Twenty bucks for so-so BBQ? To quote Rudy Ray Moore, "Bitch, are you for real?"
The dining room was clean, the server very attentive and helpful. The food was, as I hoped against all hope being great, was just okay. There were a few other customers. I remember when the place was packed, but now that I know it's almost $20 to eat lunch, I understand why people aren't flooding in. I don't pay that much at a decent sit down restaurant.
2 spoons. That's all.

Chappell's

2010-02-18T08:30:00.000-08:00

Someone should call the police because someone stole all the flavor out of this place.
A friend told me this is his go to place to take his wife. I'm guessing they sleep with a sheet in-between them. Wow don't go here.Walking in we were very impress of all the scratch up vintage football helmets adorning the ceiling. A warm cozy fire inviting us to sit and order some comfort food. Homemade mac and cheese anyone? How about (as they claim) the best burger in town served on an english muffin with bacon? How can you go wrong with that? No seriously, how can you mess that up it. The fries were even bad. It was like eating with a sock on my tongue. We saw the owner hanging out in the restaurant I just wanted to shake him and yell "why dear god why?"

Lonnie Ray's BBQ (Harrisburg, MO)

2010-01-04T07:22:00.000-08:00

This was not the usual Greasy Spooners expedition. A group of guys I went to high school with, all piled into a Tahoe and drove 2 hours outside KC to Lonnie Ray's in Harrisburg, MO. Why, you ask? Well, the owner of Lonnie Ray's is Mike Whitely and a friend to most of us for 30+ years, but Mike has been off the radar so to speak since high school. So, once we found him, we had to make the trip to get caught up, and eat some BBQ.
Harrisburg is about 20 minutes north of Columbia, and the crossroads that make up the town center consists of a general store, a Lion's club hall, and Mike's place. We walked in, Mike greeted us, and set us up with some of the best BBQ I've had. I'm a native Kcer, so it's in our blood to know BBQ. We started off with pulled pork and two sauces, one hot and one sweet. I'm not a big sweet sauce guy but really like this one.
Then came the brisket, which was gorgeous and delicious. Beautiful smoke ring, and fall apart good. This was followed by ribs, a pork steak and some of the best home made tamales ever. I'm definitely going to make this a yearly pilgrimage. If you're ever on the way to St. Louis or Columbia from KC (or vice versa) make the 15 minute trip north of I-70 to Lonnie Rays.
Food: 5 Spoons
Kitch: 4 spoons (even had a picture of the now demolished 40 Hiway drive-in, which used to show porn after 3am)
Locale: 1 (wish it was closer)

Me, Dan, Andy, Mike (the owner) Ken and Brian

40 Hiway Drive-In

GrandStand Burgers

2009-11-09T13:12:00.000-08:00

We all had high hopes for this one, it looked like the perfect greasyspooner establishment. But dreams were shattered at what I am about to say. The signature burger "The Kelly" a cheese burger with a slice of Ham and bacon. I don't believe I'm about to write this but... Having a ham steak on top of your burger does not add anything it just gets in the way and makes it hard to eat.....( I know I didn't believe it either, -holding back a tear) Bacon is all you ever need so stop it people. The rings were OK but the fries were a joke -crinkle cut crap. The best thing going for this place was the hand dipped malt and the over the top christian quotes on the walls. God damn it I really wanted to like this place. - 2 spoons.

Saturday addition-Courthouse Exchange

2009-11-09T12:39:00.000-08:00

I was up at the historic Independence square for the opening of their holiday season and stopped into one of my favorite places, the Courthouse Exchange. This place is in the basement, ala Cheers, acroos from, what else?-the courthouse. It's known for it's comfort food, open faced roast beef sandwich, hearty soups, etc. But, I found they added a whole section of mac-and-cheese dishes. Macaroni and cheese top with: bar-b-que pork, or chili, or other things. I had to have the chili-mac. Mmmm-mmm!
They've also added chicken and waffles, too. Well worth the trip to the heart of Indy.
3.5 spoons

The Well

2009-11-06T11:43:00.000-08:00

The Pitch awarded The Well in Waldo for best hamburger for 2009. I beg to differ my dear. Its a great atmosphere - dining on a beautiful sunny day on the roof with a pool table but the burgers were only average. Plus they were too sweet. I love caramelized onions but it distracted from the flavor of the burger. The fries were good - fresh cut and I like the socks all the waitress wear. Points for the chili , which tasted like it was straight out of a high school cafeteria (and we mean that in a good way). Go there to drink and for the view skip the meal. At least Blanc Burger didnt win this year.

2.5 Spoons

SWAGGER UPDATE

2009-10-26T08:35:00.000-07:00

We went back to this amazing place. Loved the barrels set in the concrete wall at the entrance which set the tone for some amazing eats.The chef is creative and skilled while staying true to the greasy spooners with large tenderloin sandwiches and some of the best fresh cut fries I have had in a long time.
As stated before the dead texan is something to behold. I think the burger was too thick but still a brillant sandwich. Plenty of beer on tap and some lonely planet rocking out in the kitchen made this place one for the history books. 5 spoons!

Swagger

2009-10-05T05:46:00.000-07:00

Sweet mana from heaven!
On the way to go to the trendy "First Friday" in the Crossroads district, we met some friends on the other side of town, at the not so trendy Swagger, between 84th and 85th on Wornall. Swagger used to be the Village Inn, a hole-in-the-wall where you got your beer from a styrofoam cooler behind the bar, and kareoke was a guy with a guitar. The cliental are the same (got greeted at the door by drunk yelling welcome!), but the place got a facelift and great kitchen.
I ordered the "Dead Texan". A grilled cheese sandwich with jalapenos inside, topped by a well cooked and seasoned burger with tomato, onion and lettuce, topped by a fried egg (you can never go wrong with a fried egg on a burger), bacon, peppercorn mayo and finally topped again by another grilled cheese sandwich. Sweet zombie Jesus it was good.
I dreamed of it all weekend. Can't wait to take my fellow Spooners there.

Johnny Ray's

2009-04-07T13:55:00.000-07:00

Classic "dive in" only a couple of booths and a big U shape counter with black and chrome stools. There is a Miss Pac-Man machine and a jukebox which I wanted to play some Conway Twitty but after some dirty looks I knew no one would find that funny. People were there to eat fried food. And they fry it they do, from burgers to tenderloins. We came here looking for a fried pork chop sandwich but alas not to be found. But the good news was they had fried cheese nuggets- little golden balls of pleasure. Crispy on the outside and gooey on the inside (just like yo mama) Decent burgers on the smallest plate I've ever seen and nice large portions of spicy fries and onion rings. Did I mention Pineapple milkshakes?

Portia's Cafe

2009-03-03T08:22:00.000-08:00

I drive past this place almost every day on the way home from work, but always forget it's there. Possibly the almost completely faded sign that is now nearly illegible has something to do with it.
But, after many urgings from friends we finally went. Gotta love a place that as soon as you walk in you hear "sit anywhere you want, darlins". I also love paces where the menu is on a dry-erase board and meals served on the same plates as my high school cafeteria.
I had the country fried steak, as it is my true test of a diner. For $8 I got the home breaded steak, mashed taters, mac and cheese, broccoli, a roll (the nice hard on the outside, mushy on the inside kind) and a drink. I topped it off with some black berry cobbler. It was perfect for the cold day we were out in. One of the Spooners said it was the best tenderloin he's had south of the Iowa border. (he hasn't been to Kitty's obviously).
The place was packed full of contractor types in from the cold for a hot meal. That says it all for me. Portia's doesn't need a sign
Food: 4 Spoons, right amount, great flavor (although the gravy was kinda bland, and who really likes broccoli?)
Price: 4 1/2 Spoons: $8 for all that food, are you kidding?
Kitch: 4 Spoons: Nothing but posters of Firemen and Cops plus the previously mentioned cafeteria stuff.
Bonus: 2 "darlings" and 3 "huns"
MAP

Mama's 39th St Diner

2009-02-19T09:21:00.000-08:00

As I walked into this dive I saw my fellow greaser spooners looking very sad and disappointed. Mamas moved up the street into this large space which used to be the classic Nichols Lunch. It lost a little of its luster from its old crammed location . "This food sucks" one said "I feel scared help me" added another. I hate to see my spooners so depressed so I took one for the team and ordered the peanut-butter and jelly omelet with a tall glass of chocolate milk and rye toast of course. Well I think that sparked my spooners up a little as a hairy knuckle hand delivered my plate of gooey goodness. The hand was connected to a lacy number that made him or her looked umm.... delicious? Think Fred Flintstone in drag. With 66 different omelets and deep fried cinnamon rolls you will always find something out of the ordinary here. Now, excuse me I'm off the the lavatory....

Road Trip?

2009-02-11T11:05:00.000-08:00

Heart Attack Grill, Chandler Ariz.
http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=4632991n

great link

2009-02-10T06:06:00.000-08:00

http://thisiswhyyourefat.com/

Sexy Update, Funhouse

2009-02-05T06:47:00.000-08:00

Went back to the Funhouse and tried the Mexican Pizza. It had a spicy sausage (but not chorizo), jalapenos, tomatoes, and what I think was a thin layer of refried beans. This delightful little pie earned 4 spoons.

Bamboo Hut

2009-01-29T13:22:00.000-08:00

I knew I'd love this place when we pulled up and were greeted by the sight of the whole kitchen staff out front having a smoke. The Bamboo Hut was a quality establishment back in the day. Polynesian decor everywhere. That was yesterday. Now it's a bit run down, but that's the way the Spooners like it! The Hut is known for it's Fried Chicken (that's what the zombie at the bar said) and it was good.

Jacques Vanderdreschd

KITSCH FACTOR- 3 --rather neutral. No movie posters...huh?

FOOD TASTE - 4--fries were a bit TOO crispy this time, but the Reuben was very tasty & crisp. Points for dressing on the side--FOR DIPPIN'

PRICE - 4

Francois Fraumage -

KITSCH FACTOR- 3.5 Needs more Bamboo.

FOOD TASTE - 4.5 Mashed taters were manifique!.

PRICE - 5 $12 for 2 brews and CFS! Snap!

Comments- free crackers and waitress who calls you "hon". Made me finish my backwash too!

Yeti Havenone

KITSCH FACTOR- 3 - one point awarded for the "aroma" that greeted us at the door.

FOOD TASTE - 2 - A dry burger and fries that were a bit too crisp filled me with regret and lamentation.

PRICE - 4 - the service alone was worth the price

Comments - Patsy on the ol'music box makes for a fine eatery

Pancho sez:

KITSCH FACTOR- 4... more just plain weird than kitschy

FOOD TASTE - 3 for taste

PRICE - 5 for food value

Comments- Sorry I messed up the group shot in front. D'oh!

Jacque Peppercorn -

KITSCH FACTOR- 3 hints of the past could still be seen.

FOOD TASTE - 2 my own fault ordering against the advice of group.

PRICE - 5 can't complain

Comments- free crackers

MAP

LC's Burgers Etc.

2009-01-23T12:20:00.001-08:00

We battled thru a blinding snow storm last winter to try LC's on a recommendation from a Northman here at work. It was freezin' outside, but the burgers warmed us up with their burgery goodness. The 'Big Deal'' a quarter pound hamburger topped with cheese and grilled onions, served with fries, and chocolate shake (despite the cold) made me forget my troubles.
A fellow Spooner dared order the Blue Goo shake. It tasted like Play-Dough smells.
Food: 3 1/2 Spoons (Other Spooners might grade higher)
Price: 4 Spoons
Kitch: 3 1/2 Spoons: Great little seating area despite the small space
Bonus: About a gillion shake combos.

MAP

Funhouse Pizza

2009-01-23T07:44:00.000-08:00

In a town that really does not have good pizza - (that's right I said it ) It was a pleasure to go to this vintage pizza haven. I felt like it was 1986 the minute I walked in. This is the way pizza is supposed to be made. With dark lighting, jukebox playing Journey, pitchers of beer, video games, paintings of scary clowns on the walls , huh what? You don't need a robot hippo on the stage when you got Gummy Joe making yer pizzas. The pizza is chewy yet crispy and as the name says its just fun.

Food: 4 Spoons. Tons of toppings. But we are still unsure what Mexican meat really is?
Price: 5 Spoons $25 bucks for 5 people to eat and drink
Kitch: 5. Could be the new standard
Bonus: Peeing in the ice

the Big Biscuit

2009-01-23T07:21:00.001-08:00

I would step over my own mother in the street to get a pile of biscuits and gravy from the Big Biscuit. Sorry, Mom.
Fluffy biscuits with nice sausage gravy. Everything is big at the Big Biscuit. If they can't fill you up, you have problems. This doesn't technically fit the qualifications as a greasy spoon. The Biscuit is bright and clean, and all the silverware matches.
I also love the MIssouri Scramble. Basically everything you want for breakfast scrambled together.
Food: 4 Spoons. Great American breakfasts and lunches.
Price: 4 Spoons A lot for your money
Kitch: 2 1/2. Got some cheesy old movie posters but that's it.
Bonus: Chili on whatever you want.

MAP

Dixon's Chili

2009-01-23T06:32:00.000-08:00

OK all you haters, let's just get this over with now. Dixon's Chili is an acquired taste. It's not like everybody else's chili. It comes 3 ways. Dry (just ground beef and beans), Juicy (meat, beans and bean juice), and Greasy (just like it sounds). You spice it how you want with the condiments on the table plus cheese and onions on request. Harry Truman liked it, why can't you? Just get over it.
Now, on with the rest. The chili spread is the shizz-net. Two tamales covered in chili plus sour cream and cheese. Mmmmmm.
But the real reason we go? All-You-Can-Eat tacos. Cheap in price, but not stingy on ingredients.
I once saw Fatfuckingwayne eat 27. I have been informed the current record is 36, set by an Independence Police officer. My usual is 9.
Food: 3 Spoons. It's plenty good.
Price: 5 Spoons. Kids eat free on Wednesdays.
Kitch: 5 Spoons. Old school diner, and you have to walk thru the kitchen to use the restroom.
Bonus: Home made pies.

MAP

Greasy Spooners last meal

2009-01-22T13:22:00.000-08:00

What and from where would be your last meal?

Bill & Ann's MUGS UP

2009-01-22T13:02:00.000-08:00

This particular review is going to be tainted by a severe case of sentimentality. Many a muggy summer night, i sat in the back of my Mom's Le Mans having a cool mug of MUGS UP root beer. As I grew older, I introduced my wife (one of reasons I married her, because she shares my love of a whiz burger) then my kids to this place. I found out that at one time MUGS UP was chain, and now the one in Independence is the only one left.
When the Greasy Spooners formed, I knew this would be one of our first stops. MUGS UP is a classic drive up, with waitresses that come out to get your order and those metal trays that latch onto your window. There are two kinds of burgers, the Zip and the Whiz. The Zip burger, means no cheese, and the Whiz with cheese. When I was kid, it was called a Whiz because they used Cheese Whiz. Now it's just cheese. Both are not really a patty, or really loose meat. I heard people liken them to Made-Rite burgers.
If you go, you HAVE to get a root beer. Big, frosty mugs of goodness until recently brewed in the basement.
For me, 5 Spoons across the board, baby.
MAP

Greasy Last Meal

2009-01-22T11:38:00.000-08:00

Mixed plate and a side of beans from Gates BBQ. -"Bumrush" Buckley

Teresa's Drive In

2009-01-22T08:52:00.000-08:00

Located just west of I-70 on Truman road, Teresa's was a great find. I pass it almost daily on the way home from work, and finally took a fellow Spooner for lunch. Teresa herself greeted us, and informed me their Italian Steak and Italian Sausage were made fresh daily. I had to try. Not only was the sandwich Gi-normous, but tasty.
Food: 4 Spoons. Great Steak sammich and crispy fries. The Large shake was too much even for me to consume.
Service: 5 Spoons, with a smile.
Kitch: 3 1/2. Classic drive - in
Bonus: There's a bus stop right out front, which is always good for people watching.

MAP

Kitty's Cafe

2009-01-22T08:42:00.000-08:00

Thanks to Making of a foodie for this one. You would never noticed this amazing place as you drive drunk into the Martini District at lunchtime but make the stop. As you open the door wind chimes hit you in the head telling you that a tasty golden treasure awaits.I don't know why they call it Kitt'y's (don't really want to)

Food: 5 spoons - Best pork tenderloin in town! You must get it with sauce. Fries & tots are a gamble may be over greasy (is there such a thing?) They also serve breakfast. Cans of pop.

Service: 4 spoons- Sweaty Chinese guy focused on the food not worried about giving change
or taking orders. I don't think they even had a cash register.

Kitch: 4 spoons Only 2 stools in this wood paneled closet. Gotta take it to go. Dont be scared.

AWARD: Best pork tenderloin sandwich in town

- MAP - call for large orders. (816) 753-9711 even the address is cool - 810 1/2 E 31st St

Hi-BOY

2009-01-22T07:45:00.000-08:00

I think I heard angels sing the first time
BaronVonJ
took us all out to Hi-Boy.The the clouds parted, the sun came out and everything in life seemed to become a little better. With the trend of hi-end burger joints popping up around town nothing beats the real thing.

Food: 5 spoons - As Sally fields would say - God Damn it! Great burgers and rings. Pretty good ruben . Fun shakes too. I couldn't decide which shake to get- the peanut butter or the hot fudge. So the very wise food angel instructed me to mix together- Hot fudge peanut butter shake- oww my belly hurts.

Service: 4 spoons - A lot of Fat chicks yelling at me. Thanks for the coupon Jaye.

Kitch: 4 - Classic burger joint drive-in design. We ate outside on a stainless steel counter.

Bonus: My fingers still smell good. Tons of childhood flashbacks to be had!

- MAP -

AWARDS : Best cheeseburger in town.

Little Richards

2009-01-22T07:31:00.001-08:00

Food: 5 spoons - My Reuben & rings was one of the best I've eaten. My pie was so thick I needed a knife to get through very yummy and a ton of pie choices like - Mexican fruit
Hot beef was good.Open faced roast beef sandwich with drink and a huge slice of Blackberry cobbler for $11

Service: 4 spoons - Classic salty waitress plus 2 "Hun's"

Kitch: 4 - Guns and photos of grandchildren on the wall. We sat by the water heater the first time we were there.

Bonus: Any place that has an old guy who is obviously there every day sitting at the counter is a good place in my book.May at one time have been a convent store

- MAP -

Jim's Family

2009-01-21T15:06:00.000-08:00

Ever want to eat in the wold of Dr Suesss? Well Jim's is the place.

Food: 5 spoons - Good onion rings and home made beef noodles need to go back for breakfast.Pretty good CFS. Not the best I've had, but close. Apple pie was delish.

Service: 4 spoons- Dirty smoky and that's just the waitress.

Kitch: 4 spoons Words can not describe the extraordinary world of Jim . History of Sugar creek on the wall - perfect.

Bonus: I was so happy and excited to see Jim then it quickly turned into horror

Not just salt of the earth, but looks like they came from earth, i.e trolls, goblins, gnomes, etc...

-MAP-

the Hawg Shed

2009-01-09T12:16:00.000-08:00

This was probably the longest haul we ever made for lunch. From downtown KC to Buckner, MO was about 25 minutes. A long way too drive? Bah! When I heard from several reliable sources the Hawg Shed had a Cheeseburger to rival Hi-Boy, no amount of driving was going to keep me from disproving this obvious myth.
On arrival, I knew it was our kind of place. Literally not much more than a shed, the place offers a drive up.You place your order, drive around front, and someone will bring it out to you. We opted to sit on the porch (the only seating) dispite the fact it was about 30 degrees out. A friendly lady appeared at the window and gave the daily special, which was BBQ. I ordered the double cheeseburger.
Now, being a lifelong resident of Independence, I am a die hard Hi-Boy burger fan. It was going to take a lot to beat out my favorite. The Hawg Shed did not disappoint. I was great. Hand made daily, these burgers were the thinner patties that I like. Lots of cheese and nice crispy pickles. They use a sauce similar to Hi-Boy. The curly fries were good too.
My fellow Spooners will have to comment on the BBQ, but burger was on par, didn't beat it out, but on par with Hi-Boy.
I salute you.
Rating:

Food: 4 spoons
Service: 4 spoons
Kitch: 4 spoons
Bonus: The little pig statue out front and a little person brought me my food!
Location:

Welcome

2009-01-09T12:05:00.000-08:00

Who are the Greasy Spooners? Let's just say once or twice a month we escape our labyrinth of cubicles and set out in search for a special kind of lunch. Lunch at a kind of place where maybe not all the plates match, but the foods always good. A kind of place that is owned by someone named Mom and Pop, and maybe the waitress has a cigarette hanging out of her mouth when she asked for your order. The kind of place that's disappearing, swallowed by a wave of chained owned suburban slop!
We've been doing it for awhile now, so we'll be posting our current as well as past adventures, so stayed tuned,